Despite veracity lies gather as weeds
Around feet, climb legs and settle
In my womb.

I am turning into someone I don’t recognize
Hard
Rough
Unmovable

The sink drips insistently
Accumulates a cup of water
Every hour
I stand, shake myself, and pour it out
Easier than calling a plumber.

I feel my joints stiffen
Everything tinted red
Behind morose-colored glasses

When did the aperture of my world
Narrow
So
Completely
To the drip
Of the faucet

Lithification (noun)

the process of changing or turning into rock, especially used in geology to describe sediment becoming solid stone

vocabulary.com

accumulate (verb)

to gather or acquire (something) gradually as time passes

Britannica

veracity (noun)

unwillingness to tell lies; truthfulness

New York Times

Aperture (noun)

an opening; hole; gap

the opening, or the diameter of the opening, in a camera, telescope, etc. through which light passes into the lens

Collins

I want to exhilarate you
To feel your smile brush the edge of my hand
I want you capacious
So that even the sky will not contain you
You want to analyze me
Open up my brain and figure out how I work
You think my love is aleatory
Subject to change at the slightest wind

Exhilarate (verb)

to make (someone) very happy and excited or elated

Merriam-Webster

capacious (adjective)

large in the amount that can be contained

New York Times

analyze (verb)

to study (something) closely and carefully : to learn the nature and relationship of the parts of (something) by a close and careful examination

to study the emotions and thoughts of (someone) by using psychoanalysis

Britannica

Aleatory (adjective)

from accidental causes or chance

dictionary.com

At her retirement we gathered
Simple paeans spoken, ate cake
Stole glances at others wondering
Figuring out whose words were fake

It's a fact of corporate life
tranche of stock are the sole measure
of employee value, success,
who can be laid off at leisure

Here at runagado's farewell
We raise a glass with much panache
smile and nod and celebrate her
career full of toxic hogwash

Paean (noun)

a joyous song or hymn of praise, tribute, thanksgiving, or triumph

a work that praises or honors its subject

Merriam-Webster

Tranche (noun)

a portion, share, installment, etc.

Collins

Runagado (noun)

A person who deserts, betrays, or is disloyal to an organization, country, or set of principles.

Oxford English Dictionary

Hogwash (noun)

talk or writing that is meaningless or insincere

dictionary.com

Cup that warms my hands:
my vade mecum, is stained
green from old matcha.
It steamed me open to the
soul that I serve back to you.

canon event (noun)

an event that is essential to the formation of an individual’s character or identity

Collins

vade mecum (noun)

something a person carries around for frequent or regular use

dictionary.com

Matcha (noun)

finely ground green tea powder used in tea or as a flavoring, originating in Japan

tea made from finely ground green tea leaves, originating in Japan

vocabulary

All her snark, long scowls, bitter silence, sighs 
Nettle under the skin, leaving me raw
Ascribe not meaning to her moods and highs
Instead cling to the occasional thaw

These years she will grow like a sunflower
beautiful, bright, and headstrong like her mom
her essential separation won't sour
the love I hold, my heart a place of calm

Because in a moment between complaint
and rolled eyes I can see a young adult.
She's becoming someone without restraint
which provides one great parenting exult

These 'tween years swing from cuddles to glowers
I'm proud of my daughter despite showers

Nettle (noun)

any of a genus (Urtica of the family Urticaceae, the nettle family) of chiefly coarse herbs armed with stinging hairs

any of various prickly or stinging plants other than the true nettles (genus Urtica)

Merriam-Webster

Ascribe (verb)

to attribute

dictionary.com

essential (adjective)

 extremely important and necessary

very basic : fundamental essential (adjective)

Britannica

In day light we saw what remained
had been fallowed by our own hand.
What we destroyed in fear now
Stew across our once hallowed land.

"What occurred here?" questioned the child
her sleep salt now turned into tears.
Her eyes built back a computer
from what was now a pile of gears.

"You must understand" I started
planning to defend my actions.
Her quivering lip, wide wet eyes
halted my stories of factions

"We must epistolize this all"
she declared, all returned groans.
"Let's never speak of this again"
I knackered said, to her deep moans.

"It was the gremlins" I declared
"Nothing worked, the screen only black."
"Did you trying turning it off
and back on again?" she shot back.

We stared at each other, angry,
more accusations were prepared.
Until suddenly we both broke
sobbing gasps of laughter we shared.

"Let us go for a walk outside"
a benevolently utter.
"We clean" she said "upon return,"
"and buy an AI computer."

fallow

(adjective) Inactive or unproductive. (Of land) left to lie idle for a season, sometimes after plowing.

(noun) Land left to lie idle to restore its fertility. The act of plowing land and leaving it unseeded.

(verb) To leave unseeded.

WordSmith

Epistolize (verb)

to write a letter

dictionary.com

Knackered (adjective)

tired, exhausted

Merriam-Webster

Gremlin (noun)

(folklore) a small fairy-like creature that is somewhat mischievous

an unexplained problem, fault, or issue, especially a mechanical or an electronic one

vocabulary.com

benevolent (adjective)

showing or motivated by sympathy and understanding

intending or showing kindness

generous in providing aid to others

generous in assistance to the poor

New York Times

Senescence comes not with a giggle,
Swoosh, clatter, or bang
But rather the virtuosity of experience:
Exhausted.
With the soft whisper, thud, fiz
Of the creaking bones
The virtuosity of oomph
Murmured while trying
Perhaps failing
To arise
from the couch.
 What is the onomatopoeia for
Not today?

senescence (noun)

the process of growing old; ageing

the condition or quality characteristic of old age

Collins

mumpsimus (noun)

a person who insists on doing things in an incorrect way

dictionary.com

exhaust (verb)

to use all of someone’s mental or physical energy : to tire out or wear out (someone) completely

to completely use up (something, such as supplies or money), to try all of (something)

to consider or talk about (a subject) thoroughly or completely

Britannica

virtuosity (noun)

great technical skill, fluency or style

New York Times

Onomatopoeia (noun)

the naming of a thing or action by a vocal imitation of the sound associated with it : the creation of words that imitate natural sounds (such as buzz, hiss)

the use of words whose sound suggests the sense

Merriam-Webster

Stepping into morning light, my mind needs a moment before
Lucid
Rub salt from eyes, investigate my body, glimpse myself,
Deep breathe 
Upteem patterns I fall into, losing track of now
And I
Swallow down frustration
Begin
The day from a place of peace
Again

lucid (adjective)

Clear; easily understood.

Clearheaded, especially between periods of confusion.

Bright or shining

WordSmith

investigate ( verb)

to try to find out the facts about (something, such as a crime or an accident) in order to learn how it happened, who did it, etc.

to try to get information about (someone who may have done something illegal)

Britannica

glimpse

(noun) a brief or incomplete view, a quick look, a vague indication

(verb) see briefly

New York Times

Umpteen (adjective)

very many : indefinitely numerous

Merriam-Webster

One Monday morning I declared
Enough! Always being prepared
just meant I was passed over, snared.

I made momentum for us all
saving the team on each close call
picking and running each dropped ball
in the end no one seem to care

Then when bonus time came around
culmination didn't expound
I made less than the males I found
at which point my smile turned and glared

I should have known their platitude
were words of the cruel and crude
my worth was less than a dumb dude
I made a plan to make them scared

Next Monday I arrived buzzcut
pants, deep voice, fake beard, pronounced strut
came in chewing on a doughnut
 into the boss's office declared

"Enough of your "only boy's" club
I am top player, not a grub
pay me more or else you'll learn bub
how all your sexism will be bared"

And stumbling and sad he agreed
begrudgingly I, he could cede,
deserved more, but from scorn, he plead
any publicity be spared.

It felt like wrong lesson learned
So I took the money I earned
and I have never returned
found a new job,  am again haired.

drag king (noun)

Originally: a woman (esp. an entertainer) who wears clothing conventionally associated with men. Now chiefly: a performer (esp. a woman) who adopts an exaggerated or parodic masculine persona.

Oxford English Dictionary

momentum (noun)

If a process or movement gains momentum, it keeps developing or happening more quickly and keeps becoming less likely to stop.

In physics, momentum is the mass of a moving object multiplied by its speed in a particular direction.

Collins

Culminate (verb)

of a celestial body : to reach its highest altitude

to rise to or form a summit, to reach the highest or a climactic or decisive point

Merriam-Webster

Platitude (noun)

a dull or trite remark

dictionary.com

Begrudgingly (adverb)

in an unwilling manner

vocabulary.com

When life seemed to yaw left
I found all that was left was you
after all we've been through
The bruises I did accrue, my heart,
I have learned my part
this time when I depart it will
be a foray. Not still -
to a life I will fill.  Not fled,
discombobulated,
with too much left unsaid. I rise
rub the salt from my eyes
becoming true and wise takes tries
finally realize
To yaw allows more tries, to turn
from collapse, pull the stern
allow myself to learn my strength.

Yaw (verb)

to deviate from a straight course, as a ship

dictionary.com

Foray (noun)

a sudden or irregular invasion or attack for war or spoils : raid

an initial and often tentative attempt to do something in a new or different field or area of activity

Merriam-Webster

Discombobulate (verb)

to upset the composure of; disconcert [a usually humorous usage]

Collins